I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again—my writing is not for everyone, just as I don’t like everything I read. What a boring planet this would be if we all liked the same things. That’s not a bad thing. I even understand that some folks who like some of my books don’t like all of them, and I experienced a lot of dislike the last two weeks regarding Finger Bang.
That’s okay. Life goes on.
One thing that I can’t just sit back and listen to, though, is reading comments from readers who seem to think they know everything. A couple of reviewers commented that the character Kaylee was unrealistic because she had never masturbated. Well, true to form, I got pissed and ranted on my Facebook page, because, growing up, I was very much like Kaylee. I grew up in a strict religious household where masturbation and premarital sex were frowned upon. So guess what?
And I confessed that on my page, much to my husband’s horror. 😉 But you know what? The outpouring of comments from readers was beyond amazing. It turns out that I was not the only woman who’d never touched herself. I’m not judging either way, and I hope that’s evident from the first chapter (and more) in the book. Kaylee’s friends are open, modern women who are more than content to explore their sexuality and even talk about it.
I think (although I have no evidence for it) that the women who find it hard to believe are those who weren’t raised in a religious household where you’ve grown up believing in the very real possibility of hell and that you’ll be going there if you sin. The problem is that masturbation, while not considered sin outright, is frowned upon because of a perceived lack of control over one’s body “temple,” and it is an unspoken rule that one will not touch oneself. Premarital sex is a big no-no, but not quite as bad if you’re engaged. Don’t ask. So, yes, this environment is conducive to sexual repression and frustration big time. I often wonder if that’s why I write what I do today. Maybe it’s the natural outcome of being in that environment.
But I felt the need to share the evidence. See, those people dogging me are just spouting off at the mouth, assuming knowledge they don’t have. An article entitled “How Common is Masturbation, Really?” in Psychology Today offers evidence to my argument, stating, “Masturbation is considerably less prevalent than many people believe.” It also mentions that younger women are less likely to engage in the practice, as well as (surprise, surprise) women from religious backgrounds.
So…I’m not changing what I write any time soon. I suspect that if you’re on my website reading this, you might be glad to read that.